pragmatism or relativism

So it has been nearly six weeks since my last blog – how things can change in that time. I am now officially a parent.

And change – well everything changes!

No longer is sleeping eight hours a possibility.

Going out is not about waiting for Rachel to get ready but waiting for the boy to have his feed.

I am fast becoming an expert in bottle feeding – how was I to know that there are different size teats you can buy.

In the first week I even made a trip to farmers to buy more newborn clothes – how can 0000 be newborn surely you start at 0 and then have .3 and .6 and .9 etc.

And you should have seen the look on the woman’s face when I asked for a tape measure to ascertain whether the distance between the crotch and the heel was at least 16cm!

But all are doing well and to date everything is progressing as it should. At this stage we think he has my nature – i.e. placid but that may well change everyone tells us.

In fact when it comes to kids it seems that everything may well change!

There is no rule of thumb and every piece of advice that is given is conditional and doesn’t apply to every kid – “it worked for mine but it may not work for yours”

As usual there are the dominant philosophies about parenting and they rule even to the detriment of the health of your child. It seems that it is better to be given what is considered to be the right information than be told about the alternatives even if your kid isn’t doing well with the dominant philosophy but that is the way of the world isn’t it.

You only get told what people wish to tell you. Partial truth presented as the only truth.

Take China and Tibet or Zimbabwe (formerly Rhodesia) to name a few.

Truth is relative – or is it pragmatic? When it comes to kids I wonder whether pragmatism is maybe the best approach to take – who knows it worked for our kid but it might not work for yours!

Last on First Off

Mahe Drysdale won the third race against Rob Waddell this morning to take the series 2-1 . Many around New Zealand will believe that justice has been done and that Mahe should have been going to the Olympics anyway. Why is this? Is it our innate sense that privileges and rewards should be earned and that somehow Rob Waddell hasn’t earned the right to race for New Zealand?

After all he chose to go and race for Team New Zealand and made his money in that arena. How can he expect to just reappear on the scene and be chosen to go to the Olympics over someone like Mahe who has devoted years to practice and training in preparation.

I find it funny that we impose this belief on others but are unwilling to apply it to our own situations. We all get upset when someone who is naturally talented but hasn’t done the ‘hard yards’ as Murray Deaker would say, comes along and is promoted over the guy who has…but if the shoe is on the other foot and we are the talented one we somehow expect that it is our right to be given the position.

Jesse Ryder proved that he really thought he deserved to be in the NZ cricket team - in fact he thought he was the New Zealand cricket team! - there is no doubt he is talented but can you really expect to have your place if you don’t have the rest of the goods – like character, patience, perseverance just to name a few.

We practice or at least used to practice an unspoken rule in business which said last on first off but does that really apply? If the last on is more talented than the middle-aged employee who has been with the firm for 20 years do we get rid of them instead?

Long-term employees are something from the past these days – apparently we change career as many as seven times during our life – there’s no time for faithfulness to the firm. But on the other hand should there be if there is no faithfulness from the firm?

So do we really deserve what we have? Should we really have that expectation anyway? We can’t say everything will be okay in the long-run because we have made short work of reducing that to the shortest period of time we can so that we can pursue what we ‘deserve’ as quickly and with as little effort as possible.

Score update NZ 130/3 - no one except How prepared to stick around, to bat for ‘long’ periods. Typical!

A very Exciting week

Well it has been an exciting week… George Lucas announced a new star wars movie due out in august this year all be it animated and the trailer for season four of Doctor Who found its way onto Youtube.

Yes that’s right I am a sci-fi geek but be careful before you start throwing stones. Good sci-fi is intelligent television. The name ‘science fiction’ itself should be an indication of what good sci-fi should be; a mix of science and what it could be. In a way it is a chance for writers to give a prophetic vision of what our future may be like.

The technology we now have would have been considered science fiction not much more than 75 years ago.

Our son will probably never buy a CD – considering what a recent technology they are, that is a remarkable thought. Not counting its recent renaissance the concept of music on a vinyl record will seem absurd to our kids.

I have often thought that a teleport device would be incredibly handy – forget taking five hours to Europe on the proposed lapcat jet with no windows – you could be there almost instantly with a teleport (a la star trek.. beam me up Scotty) of course I wouldn’t want to be volunteering fro the trial runs!

I am still waiting for the traffic problems that the Jetsons faced with their flying cars but think about it – as traffic congestion increases, we either go underground or into the sky.

Not many years ago someone would have thought you were living in a dream world if you had mentioned clones. How long before we have 3000 Temuera Morrison clones running around Auckland. How much of a jump is it from Dolly the sheep to a real live human?

I’ve always wanted a lightsaber, it has so many uses, apart from slicing people in half of course – you would never need a knife or a saw or any other cutting tool for that matter again.

But surely the best thing would be a time machine like the TARDIS - it is like the ultimate DVD Recorder, you can go back again and again and see the same thing happen and what is even better, is that it actually is Live every time!

But if you haven’t a clue what I am talking about perhaps it would be better if you stuck with real television, stuff that actually does happen, and is really indicative of life today – my suggestions – Home and Away and Shortland St.

Cheese is $12

So with six or so weeks to go until fatherhood – give or take of course how late or early he decides to be, I thought what a great time to say all those things people will hold me to afterwards regarding parenting!

It seems to me that being a parent in NZ is becoming increasingly more difficult. The anti-smacking bill passed last year has narrowed options for parents who now live in fear of even touching their children unless some over zealous neighbour or bystander imagines that a light tap is actually “abuse’ or a ‘beating’; which is completely understandable given that Sue Bradford the instigator of the law doesn’t seem to know the difference and will always use the more emotive word to support her over-reaction. When will Sue realise that those who lightly smack their children aren’t the ones who will ‘beat’ their children. The law has made no difference yet and won’t ever make a positive difference – kids are still dying – we need to wake up and actually do something rather than pretend that this bill will solve our nation’s problem.

Being soon to be parents you think about these things – like if my child is screaming and carrying on in the supermarket – hmm... where shall I conduct my family conference with him so we can reason and come to a logical outcome for the two of us – so that I acknowledge his pain and finally give in to his demands for that chocolate bar. But wait giving in now may mean he might develop anti-social behaviour and will be identified at the early age of 5 as a potential criminal and then I will have to go to parenting courses to learn how to give in the right way.

For years no one seemed remotely interested in our children, all of a sudden the pendulum has swung the other way and we are subjected to a real ‘nanny state’ where the nanny ‘mos well live in!

The cost of living is skyrocketing with staple foods like bread, milk and now cheese and butter becoming luxuries for the average family. If our Government really wants to help families then here is their perfect opportunity.

But of course I should be careful lest my blog becomes labelled Political advertising under the electoral freedom bill and gets shut down – so perhaps enough for this week, back to reading parenting books : )

Sir Edmund Hillary

Welcome back to the blog for 2008.

Today Sir Edmund Hillary died aged 88. It was in 1953 that he and Sherpa Tenzing scaled Mt Everest. That got me thinking. How often have we seen Sir Ed on the TV in the past 50 years?

Not being 50 I can’t speak for earlier times but it seems to me that we have seen him often in the last 20 years that I remember. He like many other high-profile New Zealanders is often asked for his opinion on a variety of issues in NZ.

Have you ever wondered whether they have any expertise in the areas they are being asked about?

Have you noticed that as soon as someone ‘makes it’ in one area of life that they are miraculously elevated to the rank of expert commentator in all areas of life.

I suspect that tonight on the news we will be subjected to a plethora of NZ celebrities talking about Sir Ed and how he was such a great bloke. Now I don’t have an issue with them saying that but I wonder if they knew him anymore than you or I may have.

The American election is a great example of this phenomenon with high profile celebrities lining up on either side of the political divide to support their chosen candidate – suddenly they have become experts on economic policy and foreign relations!

I guess the more worrying thing is that we as the viewer don’t even stop to question whether or not Richie McCaw is the most qualified person to speak about global warming; we just take their word as gospel.

I remember as a 15 year old being asked by the local paper whether or not I thought the drivers of Thames would cope with the new (and first) roundabout that had been put in. Being opinionated I gave my views which were duly published in the next day’s edition. Of course no one stopped to ask me whether I even had a car (which I didn’t) or even if I knew how roundabouts worked.

I wonder how many ‘celebrities’ will look back at the things they said and realised they were little more than uneducated soundbites made for tv viewing and wish they had never said them…I wonder…?